“This is your captain speaking. Welcome aboard IRFU airlines, Flight RWC 2023. After take-off, I will drag this old crate up to an altitude high enough for you to look down upon the Irish preparations for the next World Cup.
“As this flight is channelling the spirit of the original World Cup in 1987, the responsible service of alcohol has been suspended, smoking is permitted, the lavatories are a free for all and the IRFU are footing the bill.”
This news is greeted with raucous cheers from the Irish supporters in the cabin.
“So ready your good selves as we ascend far above the weekly trivia, like whether an Australian or a Kiwi should play …